Half of 70.

   I used to feel so young.... then I turned 35. I lost a very close friend and I wish I could get our friendship back. Gravity is always going to hold a special place in my life. Gravity used to be kind to me, but now he (it HAS to be a he!) has abandoned me. I found a white (not gray) hair. I tried to rationalize, "It looks kinda blonde," but I knew the truth. I am starting to look older.
The music IS loud now. I don't leave to go out after 10pm because it's TOO late. The clubs are FULL of hoochies. No amount of alcohol can make me dance (I am sure you ALL appreciate that, haha). When I go to a bar, I like to sit with my drink at the bar. Make friends with the bartender. You know, socialize! I like to go where everybody knows my name and they are always glad you came. {I have to take a little break to go listen to the Cheers theme song....... ok, I'm back and I feel a little happier now!} Does all of that make me old? Probably, but I don't care.
  No matter how many people think I am still in my 20's, it doesn't change the fact that I am getting older. I mean, seriously, what SHOULD a 35 year old woman look like? A co-worker told me the other day that she thought I looked about thirty. She said someone told her I was 25 and she told them I look older than that. LOL. I love her for that!!!!

TRH, the King and Queen of the Nerds

 My husband and I are total nerds. I think it embarrasses the kids but that makes it worth every second. Take tonight for example...... my husband is humming TV theme songs and I am trying to guess what series it is from. Definitely nerdy, but it makes us laugh. We like to chat on IM while sitting next to each other. The teens shake their heads and walk away while Jason and I continue our conversation. We watch movies and have to stop in the middle to find out who that one actor is. I know that one bugs the kids, haha. Even though we are nerdy, we are fun to be around. Jason and I don't get bored very easy. I think that is a great quality to have. Having fun no matter where you are is not something that everyone can do. Thankfully, we found each other and we can flourish in our nerdiness together. The little things are what makes a relationship solid- and we have a lot of little things!!!

BTW... my husband is making strange noises with a toothbrush in his mouth. LOL..... like I said, it's the little things.

Blame it on the alcohol....

 I really wanted to blog tonight... but I got nothing, man! My brain is fried.... and, sadly, it is just work and home stress that has killed it.

*BTW.... if you didn't watch tonight's episode of Glee you won't understand the title. If you don't watch Glee, I'm sorry that you haven't had the pleasure.

I just found this on Perez Hilton this morning and had to include it with my post. It was too awesome... great song, great singing.... loved it!

My motto for today? MONDAYS SUCK!

 I woke up this morning feeling really groggy and nauseous. When I left my house, I told my husband that I was going to come home early because I really was not feeling good. I walked into the office and saw my manager sitting there looking like death was at his doorstep. He has had the flu for a week and looks like he is nowhere near better. He told me that he was going home.... which means that I am by myself until 5. That means no lunch break until the bank deposit is picked up. Damn. They are always late on Mondays. Guess I have to work through my sick feeling because there is no way I can leave. Long story short- I never got to take lunch and I still feel nasty. Hopefully my delicious breakfast for dinner makes me feel much better.

Facebook makes me a horrible friend.

 Have you noticed that everyone is on Facebook? I was talking to a friend at work last night about a relative that she lost contact with. She was saying that she really wanted to reconnect but didn't have the money to hire a PI. My suggestion- look him up on Facebook. It is amazing to me that you can find almost everyone that you have ever met in you life on Facebook! Haven't seen someone in 20 years? Look them up on Facebook!!! You will find out too much info about them, haha. The other night, I found a Sunday school teacher that I had in elementary school! She had pics of her kids and grandkids. She is probably still teaching Sunday school.
 A lot of people seem to forget that real people are reading your updates. I have a guy that I knew in high school that I am FB friends with. One day at the mall, I saw him shopping with his family. Did I walk up and say hi or talk to him about that new restaurant that they went to the night before? Hell no! This guy is pretty much a stranger to me- except on FB. Then, there is the TMI friends. Why do I want to know about your perfect spouse, kids, job, life? Nobody has a perfect life.... get real. Or, the friend that is going through a divorce and looking for anybody to agree with the crazy ramblings about there stupid soon-to-be ex. On Facebook, you can talk to someone about their life..... but not have a personal relationship with them. That can be good and bad. It is good because you can still be at home with your family, yet talking to your friends at the same time. Doing that means that you don't have to take the time to let your friends know that they warrant your precious time. So, to all my friends that I never see..... I am sorry. I am going to give you my precious time because you are important to me. So, send me a message on FB and I will plan a date with you!

Emotional affairs are so emotional.

 On all of my days off from work, I go over to my parents' house. My mom is disabled and my dad needs a break once or twice a week. When I get there, he is normally only gone for a couple hours but my mom and I always do the same thing..... watch TV. She used to watch Discovery Health which would drive me insane. I would leave there thinking I was going to die from some rare disease that doctors wouldn't be able to diagnose. Not that I am a hypochondriac but after an hour or two of hearing all that stuff, it would get to me. Lately, my mom has found a new channel... OWN. If you have been living under a rock and don't know what OWN is.... it is the Oprah Winfrey Network.  When I went over there and saw the channel for the first time, I audibly groaned. After watching it a few times, I actually started to enjoy it. Actually, I really enjoy watching Dr. Phil.... except for today. His show was about emotional affairs. What the hell is an emotional affair? Well, after watching the show, I still don't have a clear answer. A woman (who was clearly dysfunctional, but whatever) was deemed an "emotional cheater" by the good Dr. Phil. She was not having sex with these men that she was cheating with... but she was having intimate meetings and conversations with men that are not her husband. Let me expand on these seedy liaisons that she was having. She takes her daughter to school everyday and sees a man there (no explanation, but I assume he was taking his kid to school also). They would lock eyes every day. After months of looking at each other, one day she walked up to him and said something that completely shocked me.... hi. Yeah, that little 2 letter word that is dripping with sexual connotations. Wow, she is clearly a cheater. Then, another affair happened. She hugged a man that was not her husband!!!! Seriously, in some countries she would be stoned for that. Now, I understand that cheating is not about the sex..... but that is a big part of what makes it cheating. Dr. Phil thinks that if you are having a "relationship" with someone other than your spouse it will lead to cheating. Not necessarily. If you are keeping parts of it secret then he thinks you are definitely an emotional cheater. Why does everything have to have a label attached to it? An emotional cheater? I think that you should just admit that you are in a lull in your marriage and either try to fix it or else go your separate ways. Don't go accusing someone of cheating! She hugged a man and looked at another one... well, I have done that MANY times. Does that make me a cheater? Not in my eyes, nor my husband's. I believe I am a cheater when I have an real relationship with another man. If my husband hugged another woman, I wouldn't think of it as an affair. Maybe I just haven't had an affair worthy hug? Is it different that other hugs? Anyway, I think that every relationship has its own boundaries. My husband knows where I draw the line... and vice versa. He knows that I am not going to go into a jealous rage if he talks to another woman. I have to trust that he will not disrespect me or our relationship. Without trust, you get emotional affairs and trips to see Dr. Phil. BTW, I am not bashing Dr. Phil.... I love him even though I think I can do as good a job as he does!

Listening to subliminal messages.

 For the past few weeks at work, I have heard something strange in between the songs on the satellite radio channel. You hear some weird whispering and then a line from a cover of Sweet Caroline. It sounds like Me First and the Gimme Gimmes' cover of the song. Weird? Kinda. Today there were a few of us in the office and we all heard the whispering at the same time and all heard the same thing..... "Teenagers walking around with guns and knives trying to kill us." WTF??? Weird? HELL YES! No wonder nobody at the store likes teenagers very much! We are being brainwashed!!!! Does that sound strange to anyone else or has anyone else heard of that before?

Gluttonous Queen.....

 Since I am working on Valentine's Day, we decided to have a huge dinner on Friday night. I love big family dinners! It reminds me of my childhood. On Sundays, my entire family would have a huge dinner (at 3pm... I think my mom was trying to save $$ by just eating breakfast and early dinner, haha). After dinner, the family would play games together.  Rereading that paragraph makes it sound like I grew up in the 50's instead of the 80's. We always ate together as a family. If the phone rang during dinner we were not allowed to answer it. The TV was OFF! We would just sit there and eat and spend (forced) family time together. In some ways, I loved it! In some ways, it got really annoying!
 Getting my family to eat together is not always an easy thing. Turning the TV off is nearly impossible! If the phone rings, everyone would be running to answer it. It makes me miss that (forced) family time. Maybe it is time to start forcing my family to be together. Doesn't sound that bad, right?

Some people have no scruples!

I walked into the restroom at my work and almost stepped in a big pile of shit. What the hell?! Seriously, who would poop on the floor in a department store restroom? Wasn't that person wearing underwear? Never mind... some things are better off without a visual.

How can I be so low-tech?

 Tonight I borrowed my husband's cell phone so I could text my daughter when I came to pick her up. I was trying to text, "getting off the freeway now" and instead I sent, "get".... I accidentally sent it instead of pushing the space button. OOPS. Then, when I actually got to the house, instead of texting "here" I texted, "hide". Since she is blond, that totally confused her! She thought I really wanted her to hide and so she wasn't going to come out to the car, lol.
 I feel really stupid that I can't figure out how to work a cell phone. I am a fairly intelligent, thirty-ish year old and I can't figure out what all those little teeny, tiny buttons mean! Maybe it is for the best that I don't have a cell of my own, haha. Do they have a "cell phones for dummies" book?

Karma really is a bitch!

 My ex-husband took me back to court because he wanted our custody and support judgement changed. After ten years of being divorced, it seemed kind of ridiculous to me... but apparently he thought it was important. After one failed mediation appointment (he refused to compromise on anything!), we ended up having a trial and the judge decided what was best for our kids. It made me sad that he couldn't get along with me long enough to make decisions in the best interest of our kids but his lack of sense wasn't a surprise. In all honesty, he just wanted to lessen his child support. It's sad that money comes over his kids' emotional well-being. We went into court and the judge made his decision. My ex ended up with less time with our daughter than he had before. Our 16 year old said that he wanted to live with his dad and I agreed that he can do that. So, we both have custody of one kid and one week night with the other one. Plus, because of a big increase in my ex-husband's salary, he is now paying a whole $40 less in child support. So stupid. We could have worked everything out on our own and it would have been better for us but because he refused to compromise, now he is seeing his daughter less. Trying to save money when it comes to your kids is really shitty. Hence.... karma must be a kick-ass woman who has gone through a messy divorce! Thanks Karma!!!!